I fell in love with this girl.

There's this girl
I fell in love with
on the internet.
She doesn't know me
and I've never met her
just know about her
from an ex of mine
who used to be hers
before they fell out
un-forever-entwined.
I fell in love with
her fearlessness,
and the way her eyes
say everything she can't
not that she wouldn't
just that she can't
because it's the internet
and she's trapped
freeze-framed,
this girl that
I fell in love with.
She's younger than me
and older than me
and wiser and smarter
and dumber by halves too,
because I wouldn't make
the mistakes he told me
she did, but you better believe
I make some she'd never
dream of trying.
I fell in love with
this girl, and I didn't
realize it at first
didn't know it was love
not just unhealthy infatuation
with a boy - an old boy,
but still a boy -
thought maybe it was something
simpler to explain over the
dinner table on Sunday nights.
I fell in love with
this girl, mom, and she's
worse than you imagined
my last guy to be.
I fell in love with
this girl, dad, and she's
going to be the ruin of me
for all that she doesn't know
I exist yet.
I fell in love with
this girl, sis, and she's
gorgeous, inside and out
the way you are.
I fell in love with
this girl, and I'm not sure
if it was her name, or her
smile, but I'm drowning now
and I suddenly I don't want
to be saved.